31 Ağustos 2017 Perşembe

Santa Claus and Amazons Edition


türkçe links to original Turkish article

(Milliyet Newspaper, 31 August 2017)

Image result for santa claus
"Whatsamatayou" instead of "Ho, ho, ho!"?

The bones of St. Nicholas (Santa Claus), who it is claimed were taken
to Bari, Italy, by Italian merchants from the St. Nicholas Museum in
Demre, Antalya, are being sought by means of geo-radar in an area of
the museum.  The chief of the museum, Cemil Karabayram, said that
the geo-radar effort will determine whether or not St. Nicholas's
bones are there or not.  Karabayram noted that "I don't think that
St. Nicholas's bones were taken away. His grave is not yet certain.
They're doing DNA tests in Italy but there is no concrete proof yet."

St. Nicholas was the bishop of Demre in the 3rd century A.D.

Image result for bari italy map

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türkçe links to original Turkish article

(Hürriyet Newspaper, 31 August 2017)

Giresun Adasının gizemi çözülecek Kazılar başladı
                            Amazon.com.tr

Archeological excavations are continuing at Giresun Island, which
was an important religious center in Byzantine times and also the
place where the Amazon women and Hercules were said to have lived.
 Additionally, Jason and the Argonauts were believed to have visited
the island during their quest for the Golden Fleece.

  Image result for amazons
                        Wore nail polish.

With regard to the Byzantine church currently being examined, Dr.
Gazanfar İltar stated that "illegal excavations have damaged the site
quite a bit.  In particular, the mosaics from the palace have been
destroyed.  We have determined that the skeletons found here are
those of men in their 30s."


Image result for giresun adası haritası




Rapist Gets Dental Dutch Treat


türkçe links to original Turkish article

(Milliyet Newspaper, 31 August 2017)

Image result for ısırık izi delil oldu hollandalı ercan
 Necromaniac-in-training Ercan G.

G.H. (19), a Dutch citizen, came to Istanbul on 15 August to visit
a friend attending medical school. G.H. left her friend's home on
Esentepe Koreşehitleri Avenue in Şişli the day before yesterday to
go sightseeing.  On her way back G.H. lost her way and made a wrong
turn into the Zincirlikuyu Cemetery, where a young man began to
chat her up, asking if she would have tea with him.

When G.H. ignored the man he pretended to fall ill.  As the young
women went to offer aid the man grabbed her and began dragging
G.H. into the cemetery grounds.  G.H. screamed and bit the attacker's
wrist to break free.  The would-be rapist, Ercan G., fled but was soon
picked up by police. Ercan G. denied the charges but the bite marks on
his wrist were all police needed to take him to jail.

  Image result for ısırık izi delil oldu hollandalı ercan
                            Is no place sacred!

30 Ağustos 2017 Çarşamba

Noise & Handcuffs Edition


türkçe links to original Turkish article

(Hürriyet Newspaper, 29 August 2017)

Image result for fikret gök gaziantep
                      Merciless revenge.

In Gaziantep, Fikret Gök became upset with the neighbor living
one floor below him for making noise so he put his own apartment
up for sale with a reduced price for a buyer with 7 children (!).

Passers-by who saw the sales notice in Gök's window were confused
because the broken Turkish written on the sign could be taken to
mean that "7 children are for sale".  In any event, Gök did not make
any further comment about his sign but those who read it were
moved to say "Hopefully, he won't regret a decision he made in
anger."

Image result for gaziantep haritası
                  Gaziantep province.

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türkçe links to original Turkish article

(Sözcü Newspaper, 30 August 2017)

Image result for kelepçeyle fotoğraf sonrası gasp edildiler
               Be careful what you wish for...

In Kağıthane, Istanbul, two people asked a person they thought was
a policeman to "handcuff us and take our picture, we want to play a
trick on our friends."  However, the supposed policman handcuffed
them and then stole their cellphones.

On 8 August police picked up Ümit D. (27) on a routine police check
and found one of the stolen cellphones on him.  Ümit D. confessed
to the handcuffing incident and was taken to jail.


Image result for kağıthane haritası

 

29 Ağustos 2017 Salı

Weighlifter Saw 'Gülen' Name as Handicap


türkçe links to original Turkish article

(Milliyet Newspaper, 29 August 2017)

Şampiyon, 'Gülen' soyadını 'Erdoğan' olarak değiştirdi
             Quite a weight off his shoulders.

Mehmet Emin Gülen (36) of Diyarbakır is the reigning European
sight-impaired weighlifting champion and is ranked second in the
world.  But after the coup attempt of 15 July 2016 he became
uncomfortable with the surname 'Gülen' (same as coup mastermind
Fethullah Gülen) and changed it to 'Erdoğan' (!).

Mehmet Bey explained that his children began to ask him "dad,
we have the same last name as the terrorist chief. Are we bad like
him?"  Consequently, Mehmet and his wife decided to apply to the
court to change their surname to 'Erdoğan', after which Mehmet
stated that "It's like I've been born again, getting the surname
Erdoğan.  I'm proud to carry the surname of our President, Recep
Tayyip Erdoğan."


Image result for get smart siegfried
Fethullah Gülen reacted to the news in his Saylorsburg PA
HQS.